Way Back Wednesday - Sailing to Seattle - Week Three

*This is a pre-written blog post from April 9, 2013 to look back on why we left Texas to live in Seattle.*

I would like to say, in no way do I mean to offend anyone by posting this. I am simply sharing our testimony to God’s glory, which will in fact reveal our sin, our struggles, our forgiveness, and the Lord’s hand in it all. We do not intend to single or call out any one ministry or persons. We love the Body and are in no place to judge or condemn, but we must make the best decisions for our family by the leading of the Holy Spirit and leadership of my husband. Thank you for your love and prayers.

Planning, we laid our “map” out on the table, considering all options according to what we believed the Lord was calling us to do. We have no kids, no mortgage, why be afraid of something "big"? We began to pray and knock on each door. One place seemed certainly promising, and we began doing a deep investigation on the church's doctrine, history of the staff, and vision. This particular ministry had a branch that extended to a recording label that lined up completely with what Derek felt called to do with his music. Meanwhile, we both knew the importance of not forsaking the assembling of the family of Jesus, so we knew we needed to find a place locally to sow into, serve, and love for the time being.

If you haven’t had the chance to “Church surf” in Houston, and you are looking for more than just great shows, goosebumps, and a rockin band, it can get kind of disheartening.

Derek and I personally talked about things that were important to us in our church home like,

“Do they believe that Jesus is God?”
“Do they talk about, know, and love Jesus?” “What’s the fruit of their labor?”
“What’s the heart/foundation of the ministry?”
“Do they encourage learning, and community?”
“Does the teaching challenge or convict?”
“Do they preach the gospel?”
“Do they pray?”
“Could the ministry run without the lead guy?”
“Do women run the show?”
“Does one man run everything, and have a pocket full of ‘Yes’ men?”

Having lights, camera, and action is great, but do they exalt themselves or the real, biblical, Jesus, God-man, Lord, Savior, and King?

Interestingly enough, a lot of people condemned us for having these “unreasonable standards” saying we were seeking perfection, which kind of blew us away. There are somethings that are copable but some of this is basic necessity in a home church, and should not be compromised.

With an enemy who’s full-time job is to deceive and mislead the children of God, why do you not take questions like these seriously?

It was hard to find people or a church that felt the same. We have come to the conclusion that, there are churches here in Houston that are lead by the Spirit of the Living God because God is omnipresent and loves his people everywhere, but He didn’t allow us to find them because we would have probably stayed. He told us,

"You are not running from anybody [including "church folk"]! God is leading you out of here, and the God of Israel is also your rear guard."

We weren’t drawn to leave the Katy/Houston area because of the ministries there, our past, or the people. This was all because of God's plan. He was up to something, and we certainly did not want to miss out or be disobedient. "He has sent out fish to swallow and take those whom he loves, who are rebelling, to where they were supposed to be in the first place…" Thank you Jonah. It was hard at first, not to be offended by what was going on in the walls of some of the buildings they were called the Lord’s house. What was happening grieved our hearts deeply.


But I am no ones Savior, I can only live and preach the truth of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I have to remember that God is as much their Father as He is mine, and He has a plan for them just as much as He has one for me, that glorifies Him!
Then we found Crossings Community Church. The leadership was incredible and accountable. They weren’t afraid of tough scripture or hard questions, and encouraged us to seek God and obey Him. What a refreshing group of folks.
The church that we were pursuing from our “map” was in Portland, OR. It had numerous positive check marks on our “That’s-where-we-are-supposed-to-be” check list. We were going all in on the pursuit. We added them on facebook, twitter, listened to sermons, went to their concerts, called them, and called them, and called them. We left messages, at least two on the church’s message machine, about us planning to move there and looking to get connected with leadership… nothing happened.
Nothing! No replies to emails, no call backs, no replies to tweets. Nothing! What started out as what seemed to be an opened door. Which we knocked on really hard, just wouldn't budge. We continued to pray, and didn’t recieve peace about the thought of moving to Portland. Especially with nothing opening up. We were still knocking on the other doors but we really thought this would be the one.
To be continued…


Just because it is good doesn’t mean it is what you are supposed to do. Just because bad things are happening doesn’t mean it’s not what you are supposed to go through and experience. But when you are two steps from Chuck-Norris-Roundhouse-Kicking a door down because it is what you want to do, something is obviously wrong. Especially when you have been praying for God to open the right doors, and keep the wrong ones closed.

Time to do some recalculating and allow God to be God. His thoughts are not our thoughts and His ways are not our ways.

Way Back Wednesday - Sailing to Seattle - Week One

*This is a pre-written blog post from April 4, 2013 to look back on why we left Texas to live in Seattle. Look forward to 6 additional posts including one written by my husband, Derek all about this grand adventure of love, sacrifice, God's glory, and our joy.*

I have been compelled to write. To form a pile of rocks to remind myself of what God has done. We are forgetful people, as I am reminded after reading why we gather, and He has been too good to me to allow such beautiful testimonies to be forgotten.

Let’s start back in September of 2012.

Our hearts were broken. So many lies were brought into the light. What was the truth? Did this all just happen or did we over look the evidence this whole time? When they said, “We don’t want to do baptism, and we don’t take communion either,” that just gave us an appropriate HOV lane out of there. We gave so much to this vision and were on the verge of giving it all, but God’s grace stopped us in our tracks.

I wanted it!

I wanted to quit my job and serve at this church full time, and they were willing to offer me that very thing, but what I didn’t know, and the Lord did, was that it was going to cost me more that I was willing to pay. When the truth, the whole truth, came out. I immediately repented and started thanking Him for surpassing my feelings and did what was best for us as a family. We would have been in for some big surprises if I had quit my job and became staff. His love once again saved us.

It was heartbreaking, but there was hope in the midst of this storm. I remember the Lord nudging me a couple of weeks prior saying, “I am faithful, even when my people are not.” I thought it was about people (my friends, family, and people who said they supported Derek and I pursuing ministry) not giving any money to the organization I wanted to work for, which would in turn be providing enough to pay my monthly salary. No money meant no job. I thought God’s people were being cheap, selfish, and unfaithful. But they weren’t. I got caught up in the overwhelming desire to work in “God’s kingdom” alone (which I’ll come back to), and God’s people were just being obedient. He was shutting off all of the streams that could feed into this work, making it impossible for us to drink from it. Now, His other people, the people leading this organization, they were the ones who were truly being unfaithful. His encouraging words after a devistating revelation, meant I could trust that my life was in his hands, not in my own. Derek’s life, my family’s or friend’s lives, or even these “leaders”.

I was mislead into thinking that I could only work for "God’s kingdom" if I was working for a church. God’s work is missional, and we need Christians working in the feilds as doctors, lawyers, baristas, and cashiers. I can love and serve the Lord just as much there as anywhere else he may set me.

So, it was back to the drawing board for us. Back to the basics for everything. All of our dreams and plans that went into "that" ministry, and family were now being excommunicated, we needed to reevaluate. Derek and I sat down together and watched planning, which was something we weren’t always the best team players at. I had been known to be a control-freak once or twice, and he didn’t like the disappointing side of planning. He wanted to make one definitive plan without changes.

The Holy Spirit began to soften both of our hearts and show us that planning was good. We needed to allow God to direct our desires even through unexpected events, or closing doors. So we prayed!

Do you have a plan?

Have your plans been distracted and foiled by others, or derailed by unexpected events? It is time to reevaluate, both your heart, your teammate’s status, and your current plan. Allow the Holy Spirit to show you the path he wants you to walk and allow Him to direct your steps. As you walk in faith, know that He loves His children, and nothing you do or say is a surprise to Him.

Don’t be afraid, lest you be the servant to whom he says "You wicked, lazy servant! …you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.” It’s time to dream, and dream BIG!